13th April 2007.

Two years. Its been two years since you've gone, Abang, and you're still very much remembered. So many things here are different, so many things have changed, are changing. How is it like where you are?

Two years. Its too late for regrets now. I can't regret not ever expressing my love for you, or not killing your motorcycle, or so many things I should have done. I can't take back what I've said, I can't turn back time. That's how life is, isn't it?

Two years. I still cry when I think of you. Have I really gotten over your death? Am I as strong as I think I am?

Two years. I promised you so many things, Abang, but which have I kept? Why do I keep promising to do things for you, when I should be doing things for myself? Maybe you're a motivation for me. But why do I keep disappointing...?

Two years. Abang, I miss you. Sometimes its almost as if I can feel you here with me, hear your laughter, see you getting pissed when Amylia and I do something super annoying... You're still here with us, aren't you? Maybe not in body, but in soul and spirit. You've influenced so many changes in my life, its impossible that you're not here. I always turn to you when I have problems, and somehow, I always solve them. And because of you, Abang, I will be strong and continue living. Living my life with worth, because I know where you are, that's what you'll want me to do.

Two years. Abang, I love you.

I read Tuesdays with Morrie. For some reason, I just decided to pick it up and read it. And I cried. Its true, everything in there. Read it, people. Read it and take time to do things you always wanted to do, say things you always wanted to say, because what if tomorrow, you're gone? Or the person you want so badly to say something to is gone? Life is unpredictable. Grab it by its horns. Don't procrastinate so much that you put off what is really important in your life.